I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Randomize
