Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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