I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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