I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
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