So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
