..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
