I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i love accidental penises.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
