Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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