Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
bring money and cleavage
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
So squirting runs in the family.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
