so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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