Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
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