the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
bring money and cleavage
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
