How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
high people should be assigned attendants
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Randomize
