seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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