how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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