i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
