I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
