We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
