K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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