Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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