I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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