Me. At least after what I've been through.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
