Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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