Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Randomize
