I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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