Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Randomize
