can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
you have to choose: penises or morals?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize