if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
