I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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