that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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