My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
