i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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