He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
