Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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