maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize
