i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
My life is pants optional.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
