Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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