I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
