Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
just found out that she named her cat after me.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
