she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
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