Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
