writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
