Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
