you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
