One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
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