i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
