they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i think my tv is drunk
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Randomize
