Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
