Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
