So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
